Questions to ask
The right questions to ask, by appointment
Free question sheets for the appointments that decide things. What to ask, why it matters, and what a bad answer sounds like. Take the ones that fit and leave the rest.
Appointments are short and you are usually holding too much to think clearly in the room. These sheets are meant to be opened on your phone at the door, or printed and folded into a pocket. Nothing to sign up for and nothing to download.
A first memory evaluation
For the appointment where someone finally gets assessed, and where the person being assessed will very likely say she is fine.
Read this question sheet
Coming home from the hospital
Discharge is rushed, it usually happens when you are already tired, and a lot of information moves at once. That is the system's problem, not yours, and it is worth slowing down for.
Read this question sheet
After a fall
For the appointment after someone falls, even if they say they are fine and want to move on from it quickly.
Read this question sheet
A new diagnosis
For the visit where a new name is put on what has been happening, and the next decision matters more than every detail at once.
Read this question sheet
The annual primary care visit
For the visit that is supposed to catch what has changed before it becomes an emergency, not just renew prescriptions and call it done.
Read this question sheet
Seeing the cardiologist
For the visit where heart symptoms, test results, and medicines can sound like a different language, and you need the plan in words you can use at home.
Read this question sheet
After a dementia diagnosis
For the visit where the word finally has a name, and there is a stretch of road ahead that is easier to walk with a plan than without one.
Read this question sheet
A geriatrician visit
For the specialist who looks at the whole person at once instead of one organ system at a time, and works best when you show up prepared for that.
Read this question sheet
A hospice or palliative care consultation
For the conversation that is easy to put off, and that families often describe afterward as bringing relief rather than the loss they braced for.
Read this question sheet
After an ER visit
For the moment you are handed a folder of paperwork and sent home, often faster than either of you expected and with less explanation than you wanted.
Read this question sheet
Coordinating care with siblings
For the family where one person carries most of it, the others mean well from a distance, and nobody has actually sat down to divide it up.
Read this question sheet
These are questions to take with you, not medical advice, and nothing here is specific to your situation. Written by a family caregiver from time spent in these rooms. If something here does not fit your appointment, skip it.